So much for my days as a Democrat, I’m a Republican all the way now. Yesterday afternoon we noticed a white van with a logo that said something about catering that was behaving oddly. It kept driving slowly back and forth on our block. It would go up a few houses and sit. Then back down the other way and sit. That kept up for 10 or 15 minutes.
Shortly after it left, I noticed a white box slightly smaller than a shoebox sitting on the grass in our front yard. I thought it was probably trash, but it was neatly lined up with the sidewalk and I finally decided it must have been placed there. My wife’s from Northern Ireland, so I was slightly suspicious of mystery boxes sitting in front of my house. But after a couple of minutes curiosity overtook suspicion and I went out to see what it was.
The box had a printed label addressed to me, but there was no postage on it. It apparently had been hand delivered, I assumed by the “catering” van. I brought it inside and 90% in jest, told my wife to wait in the other room with the door closed in case it blew up when I opened it. I opened it and lo and behold, it was a bottle of “Crawford Texas Western White House Barbecue Sauce” from local restauranteur Eddie Deen. Along with it was a letter from Mr. Dean encouraging me to vote for Amir Omar for Congress in the upcoming Republican primary.
I get stuff from the Republican party and various Republican candidates all the time and I’m not sure why. I even got a letter from GWB himself calling me a friend and encouraging me to show my close personal friendship with him by giving to some Republican committee or other. But nobody, Republican or Democrat, had tried to bribe me with food before. I’m Republican all the way now. After all the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.