Elephants, fireworks, and snow globes

So now that brni has revealed his funeral plans (and i will pour myself like wine) I think the time has come for me to reveal mine as well.

Actually there are two parts to the revelation: the funeral plans and then the grave plans. When my casket is taken from the house (or funeral home or whatever) I want it to be preceded by at least 4 and preferably 6 circus elephants. Then once the time for the internment has arrived I want a nice fireworks display over the cemetery.

As for the gravestone, I don’t want to be cremated nor do I want to be buried. Rather I want to be seated in a large snow globe mounted on a vaguely gravestone-like post with a large red button sticking out of the ground in front. When the button is pressed the snow globe is shaken up and my (presumably prerecorded) voice booms out in a sort of Santa Claus voice Ho ho ho! Hi, I’m Web. Thanks for coming to my grave!

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